Graduation Pics, inspirations, rants, & warnings

 

Last Friday I graduated from the St. Vincent Sisters of Charity Bariatric Center.  It is a ceremony they hold once a year (although they skipped last year) for people who have reached their goal and are more than a year post-op.  It was a great excuse to get dressed up and have a night out with my husband - and it was AMAZING to be with all of these other successful people who have so much in common with me.  Walking across the stage, with my before/ after pictures and successes being shown on power point, my hand being shook and handed a rose and certificate.  It was a wonderful recognition from people who help the obese become healthy, and from my fellow patients.  Speaking of fellow graduates...

The 62 of us who graduated lost over 7,200 pounds combined, which equals over 25,000,000 (yup, that's MILLION) calories burnt and not consumed.

22 of us used to be diabetic, and only 4 still are.

We used to take a combined 374 pills daily.  We now take 170.

One woman at my table has lost 240 pounds in the past 16 months!  Holey cow.  She was also diagnosed with ovarian cancer, and has just finished radiation after her radical hysterectomy.  She is very hopeful that the chemo will put her into remission, and shared that the oncologists said they wouldn't have been as hopeful if she hadn't lost the weight - because she wouldn't have been able to tolerate the treatments.  I know that the surgery has extended my life and quality of life by getting rid of my diabetes and other risk factors.  But in her case, literally months after her loss, she found that she could get lifesaving treatment that wouldn't have been possible otherwise. 

Seeing my Personal Care Coordinator, Diane Harris, was wonderful as always.  My surgeon has left the practice, and I have struggled with whether to follow him.  Seeing Diane reminded me that she and the other support staff are a large part of the team effort that have helped me this far, and I will likely stay at St. Vincent.  Here's me hugging her to death!

 

My husband was there to support me, as he has been through the whole thing.  We even got a chance to dance a bit.  One of the physician assistant's stiletto heels took the skin off one of my toes, but I didn't let it stop me from enjoying the evening.  Here's me and my rock.

and for a reality check, here's me with my family before surgery, 103 pounds heavier

 

So, parts of the graduation were frustrating and puzzling for me.  First - it was a dinner.  A dinner, for bariatric patients who try to avoid food-based social gatherings.  Well, at least the food would be bariatric friendly, right?  Sort of.  The first things we were served were typical catering fare - a salad and a bread basket (although the bread was flat and crisp bread, which some bariatric patients can eat a little of - not many, but some).  Salad tends to be tricky for WLS patients - lettuce is notorious for getting caught in our stomas, because it's difficult to chew it into small enough pieces.  We also are told rule #1 is Always eat your protein first - so being given bread and vegetables before our entrée was against THE RULES.  OK, well, there were probably another 75 people there who weren't patients, so they could enjoy it.  Would it have killed them to put some cheese on the salad, though? The entrees were were either salmon with squash or for vegetarians like us (many WLS become vegetarian post-op because meat and fish prove too hard to digest) we had a portabello mushroom with melted cheese, roasted tomato, and beans.  That was pretty yummy, although it was still lower in protein than I would normally eat for a meal. 

 

I made it through the dinner without anything getting stuck, which is always an anxious concern of mine.  Although, being in a room of fellow patients, I knew if it happened nobody would look at me funny if I had to make a hasty exit to the restroom.  Then they came around with coffee and tea - another no-no for WLS patients, we can't drink with our food, or for an hour after we eat.  But, again, there were non-WLS people there, and they haven't trained themselves to not drink, so that was understandable. Here's the thing though - I saw several patients at my table drinking tea and coffee!  What?  You're here for following the rules and being successful so you break the rules???   But then they brought out dessert!  Dessert.  Really?  And not some bariatric friendly ricotta-stuffed strawberries - oh, no.  Cheesecake.  OK, that was just cruel.  In a funny twist, they place one in front of me, but not my husband.  The ovarian cancer survivor and I both gave him our pieces, and frankly I avoided looking to see if any of the other patients were indulging.  I didn't want it to seem like I was going to judge others for their decision, so I just talked to my hubby while he enjoyed it and ignored the rest.  The fact is we are all tempted to take a taste of something now and then - even if we might dump.  I try to be strong not only because of dumping, but because if I have some grain or sugar I'm likely to crave it for days.  Honestly, it would have bothered me less to see WLS patients tasting the cheesecake than drinking after eating - that washes the whole meal out of our pouches and then it isn't digested well and makes us hungry again. Still can't believe some of them did that.

 

We danced, talked, had our pictures taken and waited for the raffle drawing of an Ipad Mini and Fitbit Flex (ooooh, I wanted the flex!).  What a night!

 

I also got great news earlier that day.  My mammogram came back clear.  I had gotten scanned two weeks prior and been told to expect a call - between my breasts having changed so drastically since my only other scan (8 years ago) and the fact that the new digital scans pick up things that weren't visible on the old films...  I've been spending the last two weeks worrying.  I was greatly reassured by other WLS patients that they often get calls to come back because of the way their breast tissue has atrophied looks strange on the scans, which helped keep me from panicking.  Part of the reason it took so long was because my previous films were taken out of town.  At least now they will have them locally for the future.  WLS people - be prepared for mammogram scares!  That was something I never read about in all of my pre-op prep. 

 

RANT WARNING..... (this is nothing new info wise, just me venting)

 

I am still working hard to make good food choices, and staying active.  Maintaining my weight loss is VERY important to me.  I continue to dislike eating out/ away from home, and have started to get more push-back from my mom on that.  When I told her I was surprised the graduation was a dinner she said "Well, maybe it will help you get over eating out..."  Uh, right.  Part of the reason I don't like to eat out is that eating out vegetarian can be a little bit of a challenge, but eating out bariatric-friendly vegetarian can be VERY HARD.  And even when appropriate food is available, the way it is prepared greatly varies how it will be tolerated.  Even in the best of circumstances, there are times when eating (even at home, my regular diet) results in severe GI distress.  My mom, who originally said that she wouldn't mind if we wanted to stop having traditional Thanksgiving meals together and just get together afterwards, now lays guilt trips on me for not eating at her place.  Sigh.  No Mom, it's not that I don't want to be with you.  It's that I would rather eat at home.  I don't go eat at my friend's homes either.  And the rare times I eat out - it's usually with you.  When I'm at home I have the most control not only over the food, but the fact that I can run to my OWN bathroom if I need to, and lay down on my OWN bed if my stomach hurts later.  This doesn't happen very often anymore, but about once a week I have at least some indigestion.  That's often enough.  It happened Saturday night even though I ate at home, and I had to miss 1/3 of a play while I was in the bathroom.  It's worth it everyday when I am healthy and happy, but eating is NOT a fun social activity for me any more, it is a deliberate, planned, and strategized necessity.  No, I don't mind you eating in front of me.  What I mind is you continuing to invited me to eat out/ over at your place and then not understanding when I decline and say we will meet you after the meal. 



 

Did I mention I get frustrated?  :)  This journey has been and continues to be a rewarding challenge, some days it's easier to focus on the rewards, so days it's hard to see past the challenges. Seeing all my fellow WLS patients and their successes was very inspiring and made me think about how far I've come.  It's not easy, but it's worth it.  I have a free album credit on Snapfish - I think I'm going to use it to make an album of my journey from pre-surgery to graduation!

Bariatric Betty's Summertime, and the living is sometimes too easy

Ahhhh, summer.  I'm off work (since I work at an elementary school), and my boys are home.  No homework or tests to deal with - just daily reading to keep them from regressing over the summer.  Only thing is, they think that I should be providing FUN!!!! all day every day.  Um, no, that's what summer CAMP is for, which both of you declined to attend repeatedly.  So now you have be bored at home with me! 

My day starts making breakfast for everyone, unless it's one of the days my 12 year old has gotten up early and hungry and has made his own.  I don't eat for about an hour after I wake up so I have time to drink my first 24 ounces of liquid for the day.  I see my husband off to work with the lunch I've packed and eat my breakfast.  Then the kids and I go over the plans for the day.  That starts out with a reminder that they each need to read 1/2 hour.  The complaints start then, and sometimes last for hours. I walk/ jog the dog, do a load of dishes and remind my 12 year old he needs to run a load of laundry.  I get in my second 24 ounces before lunch, and another 24 before dinner.  We usually go somewhere in the afternoon, and eat early.  Since the boys are both playing baseball this summer, we often have 3-4 hours of overlapping baseball games in the evening.  My sweet husband eats a dinner I bring at the community park where the games are being played at least once a week because the games start before he can even get home from work.  Sometimes the games go until after 10pm!

I spend at least a chunk of time every couple days cooking large amounts of my staple foods so that they are ready for daily consumption.  I scramble 6 days of egg beaters at a time - that doesn't take that long.  When I sauté my 5-6 days of onions and julienned zucchini (think non-noodle spaghetti) it takes a bit longer.  When I make up a pot of my lentils with carmelized onions it's over an hour, but that will last me for a couple of weeks.  I am also cooking for a family of friends once a week who have a mom recovering from a serious illness.  It's been fun finding things that are vegetarian that her family enjoys - my family has had such a predictable diet for years that it's taken me out of my comfort zone a bit - but it has also increased the quality of meals my own family is getting.  Eggplant parmesean has entered our regular rotation, as has fried tofu.  The other night I made fried rice with broccoli, pea pods, carrots, peas, water chestnuts, asparagus, and eggs that was a hit.  It's weird that I can't enjoy most of these things myself - they don't have enough protein or sit well in my pouch (with the exception of un-fried tofu) but it does feel good to see everybody eating well.

I do try to plan at least one fun thing a day for the kids, whether it's going to our local rec center/ pool, going to a movie, going to the local waterpark where we have season passes, etc.  We won't do anything like that until they have done their reading, however, and on some days that means it's afternoon before we get to go.  Like today.  It was 2pm before my 10 year old finally finished his reading.  He spent all morning complaining about how he didn't want to read, and he wanted to go do SOMETHING.  No matter how many times I explained "You do your reading, and I will take you somewhere, you get to decide how soon that happens..." the whining WOULDN'T stop.  Augh.  I took my dog for a longer walk just for the peace and quiet. 

Speaking of walking the dog, that's my only predictable exercise right now.  I miss my job!  It's nice to be able to have other options during the middle of the day during break, but I miss working with the kids, talking with other grownups, and most of all the 5000 steps I would walk while I was working. 

Thank goodness for my fitbit pedometer.  If I didn't wear it every day then my exercise would be pitiful right now.  It's a great motivator - because I HATE not hitting at least 10,000 steps a day.  During the school year I average about 15,000.  But now I average around 11,000.  I actually have to work for those, too.  When we go to the park I walk circles around the playground.  When my kids have a baseball game I pace back and forth for the second half of the game.  When we're camping out at the rec for a long time, I walk a couple miles on the track. 

I don't enjoy running in real heat, so I'm not jogging much right now.  I have decreased my food intake a bit to take into account that I'm not burning as many calories right now, and that seems to be working well because I'm staying at goal.  The daily struggles with making good food choices is harder some days than others - although I haven't had a crazy obsession (like the pie crust) for a while, thank goodness.  I usually stay away from white carbs because I find they trigger cravings for me and I don't need the extra stress. 

My house continues to be a disaster zone, but most days I feel like I am getting the level of cleanliness incrementally better.  My focus has been on getting the boys to help clean up their own messes (definitely works in progress) and keeping counter-tops and kitchen/ dining room tables at least partially clear.  At the moment my 12 year old has his basketball shoes on top of my papers on the kitchen table, and my 10 year old feels that since he has set up his lego building area on half of the dining room table for the last 6 months, I am being unreasonable to think that should change.  Baby steps.  This last week I tackled the outside mess - pulling up 7 bags of thistle and other assorted weeds that had started looking like trees. 

Speaking of trees, the other night a severe thunderstorm took down half of a 30 foot tree in our front yard.  Besides being stunned, everybody is fine.  Mostly I am overwhelmed with gratitude that the tree didn't fall on the house and that we weren't home when it happened - because my car is usually parked right where it fell.  It didn't even knock over our basketball hoop!  It was definitely one of those moments that I felt someone was watching over us. 

I am so grateful for the every-day blessings my family enjoys.  Our health and our home top amongst them.  But it's up to us to maintain both of those things if we want to keep them as blessings.  My sons arguing for more snacks and less work can be tiring, but I try to remind myself that I am teaching them life lessons - and that if I want them to value those things as highly as I do, they need to see our commitment to them every day.  It's easier to think of it that way when the whining isn't happening.  There will definitely be times when the overwhelming thought in my head is "Do it because I SAID SO!" although I try to be calmer in explain the importance of the issue at hand.  And there are times that I tell them "You've worn me down.  I am taking a break.  Be nice to each other and work on xyz while I go lay down for a bit/ take a walk/ run to the store."  It's lovely that they are old enough that I can do that now. 

I remain incredibly thankful for not only the support of my family on this journey, but my local support group.  The other night we had a meeting, and as I was walking out the door to attend we discovered that while my 10 year old had been "bored" he had used scissors to scratch and poke on our black leather couch.  Augh!  I went on to the meeting and vented, and we all agreed that the "old" us would have then eaten a large amount of junk food to handle the frustration.  Now my son is responsible for cleaning off said couch and his own favorite chair every night to help him learn to respect our things more.  His response "For how long?"  Our answer "Until we decide to ADD more chores.  This will be your responsibility, period." 

I am also thankful for all of the health professionals that have helped me get to where I am, and where our family is going.  I found out a couple of weeks ago that my surgeon and his team are leaving St. Vincent and it really feels like a loss.  I will have to work with new people for my follow-up.  But, they gave me my pouch/ tool and a good foundation to work with.  I will miss you Drs. Ben-Meir and Salomone!  I am also so glad we found a great family psychologist to work through issues with our sons, and have found a wonderful rheumatologist for my husband.  Never underestimate what have access to good healthcare can mean for your family.  I wish everyone had it this good!


 

Bariatric Betty finds fitbit sale!... and other news

OK, this is not my normal post, but my love of my fitbit Zip as a motivator and tool in exercise in weight loss is borderline obsessive.  This morning my mailbox had the new week's sales at Target and I saw that they are selling the Zip for $49!  That's $10 off, people!

If you are looking for a pedometer or just something to motivate you to be more active, I LOVE THE FITBITS!  They wirelessly upload your steps and other information every time you are within 20 feet of your computer (or in the case of the Zip and the Fitbit one, you can also set your smartphone to sync with them via bluetooth).  The Ultra and Fitbit One are souped up versions of the Zip where they also do sleep tracking and counting flights of stairs.  I love the Zip because 1) it's $40 cheaper 2) comes in bright colors so it's easier to find if you set it down and 3) the grip of the holder is much better - I have yet to have it fall off my clothing, unlike it's predecessors!  They all calculate steps, intensity, distance traveled  and calories burned, and all work with a fabulous website that calculates your metabolic rate and lets you log exercise not easily tracked (biking, swimming, weight training).  Best of all, in my opinion, is that the Fitbit site has partnered with www.myfitnesspal.com so that your activity is automatically uploaded in to my favorite food logging/ diary site.

Logging food and exercise is very important in weight loss, but let's face it, it's not fun.  Anything that reduces the effort involved is golden to me. 

OK, this ends my unsponsored ad for Fitbit.  I received no compensation for this - it was just a combo of my love of deals and this nifty gadget that made me want to post it for my readers.  Back to regular programming.
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The last couple weeks have been good.  I'm considering joining a WLS friend for an event in Cleveland called Tackle the Tower.  It's a fundraiser for Ronald McDonald House held at a local upscale mall that is attached to an office tower.  Instead of running a 5k, you run the 38 flights of stairs in the tower.  My concern is my knees, which have always been week and used to pop/ dislocate occasionally in my teens.  They were part of the reason I never jogged/ ran (other than my weight, obviously).  But, as I've seen - things change.  Now I can jog without knee pain as long as I don't run to hard/ fast or too far.  So, I went to our rec center to try the Stair Climber dinosaur machines that look like escalators on steroids. 

Wow.  That kicked my butt.  I've never loved climbing stairs, and my muscles recognized that fact as I completed the 10th "flight".  I started to sweat!  No reactive hypoglycemia this time - I've been back on my regular super-high protein super-low carbs so THAT doesn't happen again.  No, it was a matter of using muscles that I'm not used to using!  I finished climbing 38 flights and stopped, feeling a little achey in my hips and knees.  I waited a few days and did it again, this time doing 40 flights without pain.  I'm still not sure I'm going to Tackle the Tower - climbing up is the hard part, but then you still have to climb back down, and I'm worried that might be too much for my joints...  I'll try it again this week and see how it goes.

My bra size changed again - my whole life I have thought that a "C" cup would be perfect, and imagine my surprise to find that I now fit in (some) "C" cups!  I never wore them before - as a teen I wore a B (skipped A entirely), then went straight to D and then DD.  At my heaviest I was 44DD.  Now I'm a 36C.  Most of my actual breast tissue is gone (it happens in rare circumstances to WLS patients during weight loss), so it's more like I have deflated skin that I stuff in to fill up my bra cups, but hey - once I'm dressed nobody sees those particular battle scars. I'm also hopeful that it reduces my risk of breast cancer, and assume that mammograms will be MUCH easier now.  :)  It's funny, because when I was starving myself to lose weight in high school and was 30 pounds less than I am now it never came off my chest - I stayed a DD.  I didn't have much hope that my cup size would go down.  Now it has.  It has literally lifted a weight off my chest - my back doesn't hurt as much as it used to.  What a blessing!

Next week our family is going to Kalahari - one of the largest indoor waterparks in the world - for our annual weekend visit.  Our school district has a fundraiser that makes the cost reasonable, and allows us to stay in a suite with a full kitchen, which makes eating a LOT easier for me.  I took my "before" bathing suit pictures there last year, and even though I've already posted some "after" ones I look forward to getting new pictures with the family (even if I'm in a swimsuit).

 We're also starting to plan a family trip to Florida - we've been twice before in the past 7 years, and both times we went to Disneyworld and once went to the Kennedy Space Center.  This time we're going to Sea World and Universal Islands of Adventure - one of my sons is into everything water and sea life, and the other loves rides and Harry Potter (almost as much as me).  I found out that Embassy Suites not only had some great deals, but your stay comes with a complimentary cooked-to-order breakfast including eggs and omlettes, so I'll have a bariatric-friendly breakfast each morning.  I'm not as nervous having taken the trip with our extended family to Williamsburg this last summer.  While we won't have the luxury of a kitchen on this trip, I feel confident that I can make do with a bag full of Quest bars - but I'm NOT touching any fruit salad unless I can verify it hasn't been sweetened this time!

I had my first negative experience with straws today.  Many post-ops are warned off drinking with straws because if we swallow too much air it can become very uncomfortable in our pouches.  I've tried it a few times without problem, but for the most part sip out of water bottles.  Today I finished my drink and was still 1/2 hour from home (and a refill) so I got a Light Lemonade at McDonalds.  At first I was fine, but less than a mile from my house I started feeling uncomfortable.  By the time I was pulling into our driveway my pouch was hurting bad enough I was almost crying.  Luckily, just walking around the house dislodged the air bubbles and the pain went away, but it took a few more minutes to figure out what had happened.  Ouch!  But, no damage and another lesson learned. 

A couple of weeks ago I entered a contest with www.tout.com and Zappos where we were supposed to talk about what inspires us - and I talked about my Weight Loss Surgery Support Group.  The contest has ended, and they will be announcing a winner in a couple of weeks, keep your fingers crossed for me!

 

Lost and found, Bariatric Betty embraces hard stuff

The fitbit is lost, long live the fitbit!  Yes, I lost my second fitbit, and have been trying to manually calculate my steps and calories burned all week - boy did it have me spoiled!  My clip/holder had broken the week before and I had contacted the customer service for a free replacement.  For that week I was clipping the fitbit directly on to my belt loops, bra straps, etc.  And on that last fateful day - I jogged with my dog after clipping it on, and came home to find it gone.  I traveled my path again twice, trying to find it to no avail.  Fitbit had already given me a replacement once for free - it wasn't reasonable to expect them to do it again.  And then a ray of light - they have a new (cheaper!) fitbit - the Fitbit Zip.  It does everything but counting flights of stairs and sleep monitoring.  That's not bad - I don't even use the sleep monitoring function.  And instead of $99 it's only $59.  OK!

So I sent an email to customer support reporting the loss of my fitbit, and on the next business day... it happened.  "We would be happy to send you a complementary replacement..."  No way.   OK, I will once again rave: Fitbit - BEST CUSTOMER SERVICE EVER.  So here is my unsolicited ad - in addition to the newer cheaper Zip, the Fitbit One (which should be out for the holidays) will have all the initial capabilities as the Fitbit Ultra - but it and the Zip will be able to interact wirelessly with Apple devices and soon select Android devices.  No more base with a cord.  Woo-hoo!  I'm just getting a replacement Ultra, but for those of you who might be considering a splurge (or who want to whisper a wish to Santa) - this will be even more amazing.   Here's a link http://www.fitbit.com/one

OK, so my scale is hovering around the same number it has been on for the past 4 weeks; we are in a stall, Houston, we are in a stall.  But, I'm not worried.  I have continued to lower my Body Fat Percentage a little at a time, so I know I'm replacing fat with muscle.   I also got my test results back from my primary care physician and they were ALL NORMAL.  All my supplements are doing their jobs, no deficiancies, no diabetes, nothing wrong :) 

I'm enjoying my job, I really get a lot out of being an elementary school monitor.  Other than basically functioning as a lifeguard/ babysitter in the lunchroom and playground, I get a chance to impact the lives some of the kids.  The kid who are bored and need a challenge - have you tried running around the track - see how fast you can get around it!  Wow - you went around the whole monkey bars by yourself look how strong you have gotten by trying every day!  Watching the girl who just lost a parent find solace in helping a special needs student.  The student that told me his "heart hurt" and the resulting conversation that ended up with a referral to child protection services.  The daily boo-boos that give me a chance to talk about how amazing and strong the human body is, that it's already working on healing itself while we walk to get a band-aid.  Explaining to the children who are sad or mad that their friend doesn't want to be their friend anymore that even friends can have disagreements - that real friends will forgive each other and play together another day.  Talking about being fair and sportsmanlike, about including others, and watching the kids grow.  It's very rewarding.  In another life I think I would love to be a guidance counselor - but in this one I appreciate the chance to help when I can and refer them to someone better qualified when it's beyond my level.  One of my NSV's (non-scale victories) this week was that I was able to run around the playground track with my 1st graders when they asked me to join them - without breaking a sweat.

Dealing with stress seems to be going better - in addition to talking with my husband, I'm choosing to walk or jog more than any other coping mechanism.  Of course, last night I had a mega-wave of PMS hormones triggering some huge irritability.  It was late, and since I was finding myself getting ticked about things that I could see weren't worth getting upset about, I elected to send myself to bed early.  I just announced that I was worn out, and asked my hubby to take over - which he graciously did.  This morning I explained why, and he actually thanked me! 

Earlier this week I realized I was starting to eat progressively more of the delicious caramel calcium chew supplements than I needed every day.  Not good.  After chatting with a reader who was asking MY advice about staying away from temptation I recognized it for what it was - an addictive behavior.  Enjoying something, turning to craving something, turning to increased consumption/ usage... That might sound extreme labeling to those of you who haven't been morbidly obese, but most of us recognize that are our overeating could be classified as addiction.  So, I threw the caramel supplements out.  Bought boring tablets.  Did I overreact?  Not in this case - I know because 1) late that day I thought about pulling them out of the trash (they were in a sealed bag) and 2) because I craved those caramel supplements for the next three days.  Were they going to make me fat again?  No.  They might have led to kidney stones because of the large doses of calcium - that wouldn't be good.  But it's more the fact that I recognize that I can't allow myself to have something that I'm going to "crave" because it grows out of control too easily with me.  Will I ever let myself have treats again?  Yes, but definitely not in my first year, and then it will be a small amount, rare, and not keeping it in my house.   Eating too much of anything is unhealthy.  Even calcium.

Yes, my head is a constant work-in-progress.  But I didn't get morbidly obese because of stellar mental health, and I am definitely earning my improved health.  By making good choices over and over again, I look forward to it not being so difficult some day.  It's not difficult every day now, and I am so grateful I have my pouch to help me! 

 

Bariatric Betty Breaks down a bit, plus a new pic

I saw my primary care physician for the first time since surgery this week.  She was thrilled with my success and there were a lot of fun "Oh my goodness, I almost don't recognize you!" compliments.  She asked a lot of questions and was thrilled with my exercise routine.  She also seemed surprisingly knowledgeable about blood tests that need to be watched.  But, there were some not fun things as well. 

If you remember my birthday post, I talked about how my birthday was wonderful with the exception of some poison ivy on my face and neck.  I ended up getting both an injection of steroids and later being put on an oral dose pack as well.  About halfway through the itchy mess of that, I noticed a sore itchiness around my waist on my right side.  At first I assumed that I had spread the poison ivy there in my sleep.  Later as it spread around my back, I began to think it might be something different.  It felt uncomfortable for fabric to touch it, and it wasn't as itchy as the poison ivy.  I rubbed some topical cortizone cream on it a couple of times a day.  I started wondering if I was experiencing the skin infections/ rashes that some WLS patients get under the folds of their skin.  My rash seemed to be on top and under the flap of skin, but I thought I would get my primary care physician's opinion.  I haven't thought I would want plastic surgery unless there was a medical necessity.  On the other hand, if my skin was going to itch and sting like this off and on for the rest of my life - that might push me towards it, and I better start getting it documented.

So as I described it, she said she would take a look - we were doing my annual exam, so she was going to be looking at everything anyway.  It only took her a couple seconds of looking for her to inform me that it was not poison ivy.  It was shingles!  In a lucky coincidence, I erupted into shingles while I was being treated for poison ivy, so all the steroids I was taking for the later helped the shingles not be so horrible.    What a strange silver lining!

Next she felt my hips - I had told her about sleeping on my stomach with a pillow under my abdomen to alleviate discomfort from my hip bones on my skin.  She felt them and said "Oh my, you are bony there!"  Bony?  Never in my life would I ever dream I would be called bony ANYWHERE.  But one thing you learn about major weight loss is that you don't lose it evenly, and certainly not in any order of preference of location.  Then she felt my left hip where I have been feeling some pain especially when I'm walking/ jogging and announced that I have some bursitis.  She would have prescribed anti-inflammatories, but knew I can't take them as a WLS patient.  She said if the tylenol stops working, she can prescribe injections of anti-inflammatories, which I can take. They also suggest you stop the repetitive motion that is aggravating the bursa and causing it to be inflamed.  Yeah.  Well, I can't stop walking, and I don't want to stop jogging.  For now the tylenol works fine.  But there might come a time when I will need to change my exercise routine because of it.  Isn't bursitis like an old-person-thing?  I guess it goes with my old-person-loose-skin now.

Last borders on TMI, but she also found that the unusual pressure I have been feeling at times is due to a rectocele.  A rectocele is kind of a hernia of the colon.  In my case it isn't causing actually pain, and returns to it's proper position when there's no straining involved.  She said that there's no risk to my health involved right now but that if the pain or retraction changes we'll have to look into surgery.  Apparently obesity is a big risk factor in rectoceles.  I suspect I might have had it for a while but didn't notice it until my diet changed into 90% protein and therefore made me more prone to constipation.  So I will continue to work on packing fiber in. 

Two weeks into my new workout program results... my dog and I can both now jog North/South Roundhead circle. That means that except for a 5 minute warm up walk and 5 minute cool down walk, we are now jogging his entire walk! Boy, that was quicker that I imagined it would be. There are several advantages to this. First and foremost, I get his walk done in 25 minutes instead of 45. Extra time is a serious advantage. Second, it kicks up my exercise a notch, increasing the intensity and calories burned. I'm still not loving jogging itself, but I'm enjoying the benefits.

I'm doing the alternating walking/ jogging with my son three evenings a week, so on those days I'm just walking Perseus in the morning. Then I'm walking during my monitor shift. Last Thursday I got over 20,000 steps in a day according to my Fitbit! Even cooler, I found out that since I got it on Mother's Day I have walked over 1,000,000 steps. One million.  How wild is that???

Then there is the mental part of my work-in-progress life.  Last weekend I had a scary reminder of how easy it is to get off track.  We were holding a sleepover and I went to go make the traditional post-no-sleep-over breakfast of pancakes.  Out of Heart Healthy Bisquick.  So I got out my cookbook and made some batter from scratch, but it didn't look or cook right.  I tasted it, and realized I had forgotten to put in the melted butter.  Remixed it and tasted it again -ahhh, much better.  I made the pancakes but found myself wiping off the batter drippings with my finger (and then licking the finger).  Yum.  Uh oh.  I love to bake, and have been very good since surgery not to eat anything I bake (which has been pretty easy).  However, for some reason I have always liked the unbaked stuff (cookie dough, batter, etc.) as much or more.  Here I let down my guard and find myself slipping into old habits.  No no no no!  It's a reminder that I need to be vigilant.  I probably tasted less than a tablespoon of batter, so I didn't dump.  I did, however, crave carbs more than usual for the next couple of days.  This weekend we had another sleepover, another pancake breakfast, and I was careful not to let one drop of batter reach my lips. 

I also caught myself chain eating salted cashews when they are left out on the table.  Cashews aren't a bad snack if I haven't gotten all my protein in - but when you find yourself taking three or four nuts every time you pass the table you aren't eating to live.  You're grazing.  Away go the cashews.  Out of site, out of mind.

All of this leads up to my losing it over some innocent choices my husband made for my son and officially inducts me into the food-nazi society, I guess.  After a tough football game that my son played in a soaking rain, my family split up for the trip home.  My husband got my football-player son a bottle of "Gatorade: Recovery".  And a bottle of regular gatorade.  I found out about the first on the phone and was like "Why??? It's only 10am?  He had 20grams of protein at breakfast, he doesn't need the 16 grams of protein now when he's going to come home and eat lunch (and more protein) in one hour!  And it has a lot of sugar, too.  He doesn't need that.  He's going to get high blood sugar and then crash as the insulin kicks in and feel horrible."  The when they got home I saw a second bottle of regular gatorade being consumed on top of the first one and just took it from him and threw it out.  "Did you know that the American Academy of Pediatrics recently said that NO STUDENT ATHLETES WILL BENEFIT FROM SPORTS DRINKS?  That basically it's like giving them sugar water or pop.  The only gatorade they should get is the low cal one, and even then it's unnecessary.  Water is best.  If they want to drink one of these for treat - like instead of an Icee, that's OK, but this is not helping him!"  Add in that they stopped at GameStop on the way home so he could blow his allowance when his brother also wanted to go there, and I was beyond irritable. 

It didn't help that I was tired, having to get up at 6am on Saturday to get him to the pre-game warm-up and meeting.  Or that I hadn't gotten my usual morning walk/ jog in with the resulting endorphins.  But I think mostly it was feeling overwhelmed.  Pushing myself to keep up with my exercise, work, finding out about the shingles/ bursitis/ rectocele, and the normal daily struggling with the kids about homework/ cleaning up/ etc.  I just lost it.  My poor husband. 

So the last couple weeks have been a little shaky, but I'm leaving them behind and climbing back out of that place.  I went to a baby shower yesterday at a beautiful restaurant and drank water through the whole thing.  I really enjoyed seeing a lot of extended family, and really liked most of the compliments I got as well.  The only exception being the one surprised "You look really pretty!" that was then amended to "Oh, not that you weren't pretty before."  Yeah, it's OK, I understand.  And the spirit it was intended in was nice, and they're right I do look a lot better.  I did have to spend about 15 minutes explaining why Visalus would NOT be a good choice post bariatric surgery.  Does anyone else feel like that's a pyramid scheme?  Oi vey.  Anyway, it was fun for the most part, and I brought the take-home goodies back for my boys.  Here's a picture.

 

Bariatric Betty's body and mind - new pics

I'm coming up on my 6 month post-op point and so much has changed.  Many things, but not everything.

I am no longer diabetic!!!  That will always deserve first billing and multiple exclamation points.  I know that not everybody who has WLS has their diabetes go into remission, and that it can return, but so far I am among the lucky ones and hope to stay that way.  I was just talking to my 9 year old about it yesterday.  That I can assume I will live to see my kids grow up and maybe see grandkids or even great-grandkids some day is something I could not presume before. 

My body continues to morph into a previously unknown thing.  I wrote months ago about the bizarre feeling of realizing that my hips were holding up my pants (instead of my belly).  The first step in that particular revelation was understanding that those two bumps on my front that were feeling pressure from jeans, were in fact, bones.  Bones that I had never before noticed, but had always been there.  These bones weren't visible, but were noticeable for the first time because of the decrease in the fat pad that laid over them.

Recently I have experienced the surfacing of other underlying structures - bones, tendons, etc.  These are not always fun - they are sometimes startling.  I am reminded of an article I read several years ago where a formerly obese woman suddenly notice the prominence of her shoulder blades and thought she might be deformed. 

Lying on my side, the excess skin and fat redistributing down with gravity leaves my hip and pelvis remarkably exposed.  I find myself squeezing them, poking them, and outlining them as I get to know this new "normal" for me.  A few times I have asked my husband to feel them as well, and let me feel his bones to compare and reassure myself that these are indeed, normal.  You mean average people feel these things every time they lay down?  Weird. 

The Anterior Superior Iliac Spine.  Yeah, I looked it up.  Those bumps that help hold my pants up are now painful at times.  Not when active, nothing like arthritis.  They hurt when I lay down on my stomach - my preferred sleeping position.  I think it is more accurate to say that my skin hurts. Having less padding between the bones and skin has apparently made me very sensitive to the pressure.  I frequently find myself putting a pillow under my pelvis (in addition to the thick mattress pad we also have) to give a little extra cushioning. 

I also have lower back pain - a common complaint in WLS patients.  Our center of gravity has changed, and our core muscles are having trouble adjusting to the redistribution.  In my case, my large chest has always caused some back pain, and now that weight is leaving other parts of my body much more than my chest, that increased ratio has resulted in increased pain.  Just leaning forward when brushing my teeth can be fine 20 times, but the 21st and I look like the stereotypical old man, hunched over with a hand on their back.  Most frequently the pain comes when I'm getting up from a lying down position.

I enjoy seeing muscle definition in my legs and shoulders.  I think seeing definition in my clavicles and shoulder blades is attractive!  I never carried much of my weight in my legs, but the jogging has reshaped them anyway.  Feeling the steely tendons around my knees is fun.  Which brings me to a LACK of pain in my knees.  Many morbidly obese people have significant orthopedic issues, hip pain and knee pain being very common.  I was lucky not to have those.  However, I have always had "bad" knees, and even when just "overweight" would have problems where my knees occasionally "popped" out of alignment when I was running or climbing.  That would result in my being on crutches for a week or two at a time.  It didn't happen when I was a morbidly obese adult because I wasn't doing high impact exercise. 

When I started Couch-to-5k training I was very nervous about how my knees would react.  I found that if I opened up my stride and ran it hurt my knees almost immediately, but if I ran short strides low to the ground I stayed pain free.  Having my muscles and tendons tighter than they've probably ever been has given me more support, and I haven't had one incidence of "popping".  Yesterday I actually jogged 25 minutes and felt fine (although really tired) when I was done.  This is a picture of me from last Friday when I finished my first 22 minute jog.

A little hot, a little sweaty, tired and thirsty - but happy.  I can't say I ENJOY jogging, but I find it very rewarding when I'm done.  In two weeks I should be jogging 30 minutes at a time - that is supposed to be the equivalent of a 5k!  When I have completed that challenge, my goal is to 1) choose a 5k to actually run in and 2) Start training my dog in the Pooch-to-5k so that we can change our morning walk to a morning jog.  Next goal - Tackle the Tower  - a stair climbing challenge to climb the Terminal Tower in Cleveland. 

However, parts of my mind remain stubbornly unchanged.  I find myself choosing sedentary things - being online (like now), watching TV, reading - more often than active ones.  I can and do join my kids when they go swimming, play ball, etc for a while, but then often grab a book while they continue to play.  My fitbit calls me active, burning lots of calories and getting over 10,000 steps a day, but I have long periods between active times when I sit - and I don't have a desk job.  I hope those periods start to decrease.  I know once the school year starts I will be standing and walking 2 1/2 more hours a day M-F again.  The head-work continues to be the hardest part of this journey.

Looking forward to my 6 month post-op checkup on my 42nd birthday next week.  I'll be sure to post again then.

Bariatric Betty's mistaken identity and favorite tools

This past week I confused the heck out of three people.  Two of them were friends who hadn't seen me for months.  In addition to my ongoing weight loss, I also had to start wearing glasses for the short term - my extended wear contact were causing some scarring on the inside of my eyelids.  Ouch.  So I'm restricted to wearing glasses (which I hate) for several weeks.  So a slimmer me, with glasses, and my hair looks different with the hair loss catching up with me (plus not styling normally with the glasses).  Understandably I'm giving come friends double takes.

My third person was a bit more amusing/ disturbing.  I was at the community Rec Center doing our Couch 2 5K workout last Friday with my 9 and 11 year old boys.  It was the first workout of week 4, so predictably I was extra sweaty looking at the end.  My boys actually couldn't finish the workout but I did (yay me).  Then I headed over to the free weight area to do some crunches before meeting them downstairs in the lobby.  As I reclined back on an exercise ball, someone tapped on my leg and said "Excuse me, how old are you?"  Huh?  I sat up, saying "I'm 41" while a startled older man on staff stammered "Oh, I'm sorry, you didn't have to tell me your age."  Huh squared?? He did just ask me my age, so I presumed I did need to tell him for some reason... although I didn't know what.  Looking embarrassed he explained that he thought he saw three young boys coming off the track and followed one of them (me) over to the weight area to check to see if I was old enough to work out there. 

I can understand people not recognizing me right away, but thinking I'm a boy?  The 36-DD bra wearing woman, a young boy?  OK, I was wearing an old (over large) t-shirt, and my hair is short, but a boy?!?  The gentleman apologized, and I laughed it off saying I'd rather be mistaken for a young boy than an old woman.  I think.  One of his friends cracked up and said "He sure does have a way with the ladies, doesn't he?"  I do have a confession.  As soon as I got home to shower I put on something that fit better with some earrings and makeup!  My pride can handle it once, but not twice in a day! 

I decided I wanted to share some of my favorite tools that I've found on my journey so far, and hope that they might be ideas some of my readers would like/ could incorporate. 

First I will share my favorite food and beverage storage system: Lock & Lock containers!
http://www.amazon.com/Lock-24-Fluid-Bisfree-Sports-2-9-Cup/dp/B005074CNO/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1341879450&sr=8-1&keywords=lock+%26+lock+bottle

This is a link to my 24 ounce water bottles.  I use 3-4 of them daily.  I use a Crystal Light / or a generic sub 2 Qt. mix to make 3 (72 ounces) of them slightly diluted.  I find that the full strength Crystal Light seems too strong nowadays.  If I make 3 of them up at one time, I know that once I've finished my first three bottles I'm on bonus fluids for the day.  The main reasons I like them, however, are the lids and wrist straps.  The lids close tightly, and the actual opening to drink from is on the smaller side.  It's not a straw or sipper, so I don't take extra air into my pouch (note to non-WLS readers - that's painful) and it doesn't come out too fast so I don't gulp it down too quickly (gulping causes reflux - it basically just gushes back up into your mouth because it can't drain through your pouch faster than quick sips).  The wrist strap leaves your hands free to carry everything else other than your water bottle!

Lock & Lock also make great water-tight, air-tight and BPA-free containers that I use daily.  I love my simmered lentils with sauteed onions, and make it up in large batches (about 14 servings at a time).  These containers are great for refrigerating or freezing individual or multiple serving sizes.  You can microwave them, throw them in the dishwasher, and toss them in your purse without worrying about leaks.  I have almost eliminated baggies from my life and use these instead for packing lunches for the rest of the family as well.  The smaller sizes only hold about 5-6 ounces, but that's a decent serving size for bariatric patients.  If my whole meal is in one, I'll use an 11 ounce ( almost 1 1/2 cups) but not fill it all the way.  The larger boxes that come in the sets are great for storing things.  I gave away several filled with cookies last Christmas.  They also make bento boxes, lunch boxes, etc.  These things aren't cheap, but they LAST and if the tabs on the locking lids break, the company will send you free replacements.  I have found that they go on sale periodically on sites like www.woot.com

Second shout out has to be Fitbit! A pedometer on steroids, a digital coach that cheers you on and lets you share your activity levels with friends (only if you want to) to encourage/ compete with each other. It also communicates all of your activity info/ calories burned with MyFitnessPal.com if you already log your food there. The $99 price tag is steep, but I can personally testify that not only is it a great motivator, if anything goes wrong with your unit, they send you another one free!!!  In my case, they sent me a free replacement when I LOST my first one.  And no, they didn't know I had a blog or ask me to talk about it.  They were just that NICE.  www.fitbit.com

Third has to be a combination of my Weight Loss Surgery private boards on Facebook and one of my favorite blogs to read:  http://www.theworldaccordingtoeggface.com/  Next to my local support group, I can't tell you how much the private support groups on facebook have helped me.  They've been sources of encouragement, information, support, warnings, and more.  Yes, we've all seen people get a little too worked up over something someone else has posted (or gotten worked up ourselves) - but so far the pros far outweigh the cons for me.  The World According to Eggface blog is FANTASTIC.  Shelley has a great sense of humor and a wealth of knowledge.  Her "A Day in My Pouch" recipes are top notch, and she shares lots of great ideas.  She also has fun giveaways.  Maybe I should look into doing some of those...

Some of my other favs include Sugar Free Torani Vanilla Syrup (especially getting the "subscription discount" on Amazon.com), my Omron Body Fat Monitor (great for scale stalls), and Quest Protein Bars (but beware a virus on their website - I get them at the Vitamin Shoppe or on Amazon).

If any of my readers have any favorite tools they want to share, please feel free to mention them in the comments, I'm always looking for new ideas.

Bariatric Betty 99 days post op; Joy, Pride, and Fitbit!

I went to my 3 month post-op visit this week and got great news!  Since my operation I have lost 40 pounds, which is 46% of my excess weight on the day of surgery. 70 pounds since the beginning of my blog.  The doctor was thrilled and called me a "model patient".  I felt like my teacher just gave me a big gold star, and couldn't stop smiling all day - even when my labs where being drawn.  I also enjoyed wearing my new size 12 shorts that day. 

I got a Fitbit this month, kind of a pedometer on steroids.  It not only tracks steps taken and distance traveled, but flights of stairs climbed, calories burned based on your profile, and has a motivating graphic of a flower that grows taller the more active you have been in the past 3 hours.  I have been LOVING my Fitbit, and the fact that it downloads the info wirelessly to the website, which then communicates my exercise information to www.myfitnesspal.com (where I log my food) automatically - which really simplifies my activity logging.  I've also found  that it motivates me to push myself farther - so I can reach the 10 flights of stairs, or so I can hit a new "record" for steps taken in a day, etc. 

I clip my Fitbit on every morning, and the morning I had my follow-up appointment was no different.  What was different was that by the time I was at my surgeon's office I realized it wasn't clipped on any longer.  I lost my Fitbit.  I back-tracked my errands that morning and have been unable to find it, so I contacted support@fitbit.com and asked them if I could purchase another unit but without the charging base (and therefore hopefully cutting down the replacement cost).  To my surprise, after giving them the information about where I purchased it, on what date, and what email address it was registered under, they offered to send me a new one FOR FREE!  Are you kidding me?  I can't say enough about their customer service.  Their product didn't break - this was all on me and they are sending me a new one. 

So I'm sending a shout-out to the folks at Fitbit today, and it's just part of the reason I'm smiling so much this week.

Here's another.  I've lost two pounds in the last two days.  Huh?  Yeah, we all know that our weight fluctuates daily.  So a one day one pound difference is normal, and I tend to lose 1-2 pounds a week right now.  The weird part is, I was already down 1.5 pounds for this week - and now I lost another 2.  So I found myself grinning as I walked around the neighborhood with my dog this morning.  It's important not to become dependent on seeing weight loss on the scale all the time - I have gone for 5 days or so without seeing a drop, and those are the days that I have to remind myself that my body will go at it's own pace but continue to get healthier as long as I follow the program.  I remind myself that I will have plateaus in the future - real ones that last weeks, not days.  But to not do anything different and lose 3.5 pounds this week instead of 1-2... yeah, baby!

After my appointment, I had another class with the nutritionist.  I explained that I was concerned about trying bread and pasta - both because they could be triggers, and because I was worried about dumping.  She encouraged me to try some small low carb options.  I tried making cheese pizza on Flatout Lite Italian and could only eat about 2/3 of it.  It didn't make me sick, but the bread felt like a rock in my pouch - not really painful but uncomfortable.  I have no interest in trying it again any time soon - no trigger there.  Then last night I tried eating half a small pita bread as a cheese sandwich with provolone, lettuce, and avocado.  It tasted great, but I got that same pouch-full-of-setting-cement feeling after a couple bites.  So I know I CAN eat these grains in moderation without dumping, or having them get stuck.  But I don't WANT to.  Avocado, on the other hand, I think I could eat daily (yum!) if only it was a protein source ;) 

I'm really proud of myself and feel certain that I will get to my personal goal (140-150 pounds).  The surgeon expects that I might be around 150 at my 6 month follow-up! 

I'm preparing for the end of the school year.  I will enjoy spending more time with my sons (most of the time, anyway) and not going to work.  However, I will be losing the paychecks and guaranteed extra 5000-7000 steps M-F that I have been getting as a school monitor.  So, I'm preparing to start Couch to 5K training with my boys.  My goal is for all three of us to be able to jog one as a team by the end of the summer.  I've never liked running, and don't have the best knees in the world, but after hearing about the successes of other WLS patients with this program, I'm really excited to try.  That, walking the dog, and swimming will be my exercise staples over break, supplemented by the elliptical on bad weather days.  We are also planning for our upcoming trip to Williamsburg and some weddings of friends. 

Hoping all my readers have one of these can't-stop-smiling days soon.  Happy Friday!